I understand that a number of people in America (and on my fair isle) have come down with Premature Capitulation. I am SO sorry to hear this!
Q: What is Premature Capitulation?
A: It is a most horrible condition! Imagine suffering the pains of defeat for almost three months time when…it has not yet even happened? This is the most painful aspect of the condition, by far, BUT such agony is often compounded by the insidious co-symptom of “spreading despair to others.”
Truly. We must be vigilant!
This plague can be most dangerous if it gets out of control!
Of course, for the lucky and the wise, there is a fabulous inoculation that has a high rate of efficacy! It’s ingredients are quite safe, but it should be noted that recipients of this medicine have been known to fly into fits of joy, impulsively purchase plane tickets (to Philadelphia, for some reason), and they tend to become strong proponents of this cure…a laudable if sometimes annoying side effect.
Ingredients of The Cure for Premature Capitulation include:
• Historically Accurate Facts
• Relevant Examples of Past Events
• Clear Evidence that Convention Strategies/Results Can Yield Surprising Results
Yes. The Cure for Premature Capitulation (see below) is long and detailed, but that’s okay, right? After all, we are engaged in a Political (R)Evolution and such social movements invariably demand much of us!
Do you have a friend or family member exhibiting signs of Premature Capitulation? Perhaps you are suffering the early signs yourself? If so, do not hesitate! The sooner a person is inoculated, the less they will suffer and the more effective the cure…plus, you’ll be helping to prevent the spread of this terrible condition!
Other potential side-effects:
• Multiple Moments of Surprise
• Individual Expressions of Relief
• Heart-Rate Acceleration (as a result of Renewed Hope)
• A Startle Reflex & Re-Reading of Entire Paragraphs (as one recognizes the shocking similarities between FDR’s time and our time)
• Spontaneous Donations (of $27 or more) to Bernie Sanders’ Campaign
• An Impulse to Pick Up Your Phone & Start Phone-Banking California
• And other EMPOWERMENT-RELATED behaviors…
We thank you for sharing this important public health message with every person in America!
Get inoculated now! Help prevent an epidemic of Premature Capitulation!
Click on the link below and Start Feeling Better Today!